So I like to torment them as much as I can.
And I mean that in the nicest way possible, of course, because I think the meanest thing I have ever said to anyone was when Amanda Jarowski asked me if I liked her and I said "no" way back in the seventh grade.
But it would probably be better if you took my word for it and didn't check that story with my siblings.
Anyway, they are Johnny and Adam. I just enjoy doing things like grabbing Johnny's hand when he tries to high-five me and saying "we can't keep seeing each other in passing like this. I'll go mad," in a very serious voice.
They don't know me well enough/are too ridiculously sweet and quiet to laugh at me or give me disgusted looks or call my bluff.
Tonight, I went to Adam's apartment for dinner group. He had made these really freakin delicious south American things...papoosas?
Hmm, ok, I googled it and all I'm getting are pictures of native americans with babies strapped to their backs. It sounds something like that, anyway.
It's a homemade tortilla with beans and cheese inside it and you dip it in salsa. Also, he had made hot chocolate. Here is how our conversation went.
Me: Adam, these are really good.
Adam: (head bob, smile)
Me: Adam, you are my hero for making these.
Adam: (goes into the kitchen)
Me: Adam today was a long, hard day. I took a test and walked home in the cold February dark and came HERE, where I am eating these...these delicious things and using your mug for this fantastic hot chocolate. This is the greatest thing of my life.
Adam: (head bob, smile) I'm glad you liked it.
Me: Adam. Adam, no. That is an understatement. (Stare at Adam until he looks back. Chest pound with one fist) You are my hero. I want to hug you or date you right now.
Adam: (nervous smile)
Me: You are my hero FOREVER...okay. okay, bye. BYE ADAM, THANKS FOR DINNER.
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